We have booked an appointment to have some family photos done. Poor Cayden is suffering from "second child syndrome", we have pictures of Dania everywhere but, very few of Cayden so, we thought we would get some professional ones done. I hate having my picture taken on a good day and I'm afraid I'm going to ruin these pictures. To make matters worse, I had a dream on the weekend about some girls I knew in University (think the "Mean Girls" movie) and for some reason it has dropped my self confidence to an all time low! I'm in a bit of a "funk", nothing major but, I'm just wondering how long post-pregnancy hormones actually affect us. (I'm blaming it on the hormones.)
I've made a huge decision about my job, I'm stepping down from my old position and will only be going back 3 days a week. I'm excited to have more time at home with the kids but, I'm worried about finding a dayhome. Lots of places only take full-time children, others only take children over a year old and some I just wouldn't leave my children with!! I'm sure that is all adding to the "funk" and things will work out the way they are meant to. I have to believe that or I will make myself totally crazy!
When I had Dania, I suffered from postpartum depression (just a mild case) and couldn't wait to get back to work. I felt so overwhelmed with her and work was truly what I knew. I'd always worked full-time (sometimes even more than full-time) and it was my comfort zone. Lots of people said that once I had kids my priorities would change and I'd want to be home with them. Finally now with Cayden, and Dania being older, I truly understand what they were talking about. I'm excited to be home with them more than I'm away. I still have a few months to go before I'm back to work and am enjoying my time at home while I am so lucky to have it.
OK, so I'm pretty sure I've rambled on long enough for one night. I'm sorry it's such a jumble of things but, it's just where my head is at tonight! Things will all work out and I'll finally be able to exhale! Good night to everyone and I'll be back!